Shameless Plug

Hi everyone,

I promise that I am writing a new chapter to this story, but I had this other idea for a story that I couldn't get out of my head. So you can read the intro to that in the meantime while you wait :)

http://leavingthepresentbehind.blogspot.com

Thanks for being patient!!

Chapter Five

Thanks for all the feedback and patience with me! School's out for the summer so more updates should be coming as long as writer's block doesn't get a hold of me..


September 2006

“This chick was so hot! I’m telling you guys, this one was a good time if you know what I mean..”

The guys whistled and laughed at Max’s raveling over his summer fling while the girls just rolled their eyes in disgust. The team was back in the Burgh just in time for training camp to begin. They were all in the locker room dressed early and eager to get back on the ice for the first day. It seemed as if they were all on fire or fed too much sugar for the adrenaline that everyone felt in the room. Even though last season was certainly not their best, they had a feeling that it could only go up from here at this point.

“So did any of you actually do something besides screwing the girl that caught your Frisbee on the beach?” Abby asked.
The guys looked at each other and shook their heads amused with themselves.
“That’s pathetic,” I said annoyed.
“Rach, how bad of a day is this? I woke up around 11:00 every morning, ate a couple of omelets, went to the pool, caught myself a fine woman, took her to dinner, and participated in my nightly exercise routine!” Max explained. “Then, the next day, I woke up and did it all over again!”
“You’re a pig!” I replied.
“No I’m not! It’s just exercise! I need to stay in shape during the summer!”
“If that’s how you stay in shape, then no wonder we can’t win a game,” a familiar voice said as he entered the room.

I turned around knowing that I would see Sidney, but I had to keep my eyes from widening and my jaw dropping. This was not the Sidney Crosby that had left in April earlier this year. You could definitely tell that he worked out this summer. He had a good muscular built to him as I could see the lines defined beneath his under armor. His hair was longer, but not too long to mistake him as a rock star that stepped out of the 80’s. His baby face was disappearing as he looked more like an adult instead of a teenage boy. And then, there were his eyes. They always had some sort of light to them that it took so much of my strength to keep from drowning in them.

Stop it, Rachel!

This is the first time I’ve seen him in a while. Despite his countless attempts at calling, we haven’t said a word to each other since his summer fling. I know what you girls are thinking: I’m crazy, right? Maybe, but put yourself in the situation. Would you really have respect for someone like that? Someone who covers up their hidden identity of who they really are? True, I’ve only known Sidney for a year, but I think I’m allowed to be opposed to this when the guy is apparently trying to get to me. Last time I checked, sleeping with another girl wasn’t the way to win someone’s heart.

Trust me, he hasn’t got a hold of me. I’ve got it all under control. It’s just time that he knows that if there is even a possibility of being friends, he has a lot to prove to me.

“You should talk, Crosby! We all know how the Dominican Republic went down!” Max fired back jokingly, but immediately regretted it once the silence entered the room.

I’m not gonna lie, I snickered at Max’s attempt to defend himself. Sid asked for it; he should have known that. What granted me even more entertainment was how uncomfortable it made him. I felt like I needed some popcorn with the interaction between the entire room as the guys threw comments back and forth at each other on their summer flings. Eventually, Abby and I were pretty annoyed with the whole topic, and just when we were about to leave, a comment caught me off guard:

“Yeah, well it’s not even like I liked the girl or anything! It just happened!”

I turned my head around towards Sidney and the entire locker room. “Oh really? So you just reel in whatever girl you can just to satisfy your needs? That sounds like a guy I’d wanna get with.”
Sidney was shocked. Probably because I’d never been so nasty to him before. He then got defensive, “Rachel, you don’t even know what happened.”
“I know enough to know that you’re just a whimp who doesn’t know who he really is!” He tried to interrupt, but I continued. “Listen, if you think everyone will do anything you please because of who you are, then you are sadly mistaken! No one wants to be around a person like that! And don’t give me this sad sob story of how you were drunk and you didn’t know what was going on! That doesn’t excuse you or anyone in this room!” I said as I focused my attention towards the rest of the team.
“You guys want to find a real girl? Stop lying to us.”

Just realizing what kind of a scene I caused, I pushed open the doors to the locker room and started walking towards the exit of the arena. My mind was fuming. How dare he, along with every other guy in that room, think of girls as just a way to get a quick fix for themselves. It was silly of me to think of how considerate he could be when he was only after completing himself.

I suddenly stopped in my tracks. Was that what he was after with me? Just a temporary getaway until the next one came along or he got bored? How egocentric could this boy be? I clenched my fists in anger to keep me from screaming. But I ended up anyways as a firm hand placed itself on my shoulder.

“Don’t touch me, Sidney,” I said knowing very well who it was and turned around to face him with a determined look to not let him get to me.
“You have to let me explain this to you,” he replied as his hand stayed on my shoulder.
“You don’t have to explain anything to me,” I shrugged his hand off my shoulder. “You contradicted yourself when you told me that you weren’t like most guys. All this bullshit about not going after one night stands. I know I can’t control what you do, but I refuse to have you lie to me! I’m not stupid!”

As I turn to walk away, he grabs my elbow and firmly pushes me against the brick wall of the arena. He does so to make sure he doesn’t hurt me, but makes it known that I’m not leaving this spot anytime soon. At this point, I’m scared. I don’t know what’s come over him with this determination to make himself right. I refuse to show him how defenseless I am right now as I slowly look up towards his eyes. What surprises me is the fact that he doesn’t look angry. His eyes show that he wants to do everything to convince me to believe any word that flies out of his mouth.

And then I think about the caring person that he can be. The way he laughs, the way he jokes around with me. But the most important thing: the way he listens to me. Every conversation, his eyes are always directed towards mine when I speak. And he never once goes off on his own in his head. I’ve never had a guy that listened to everything I had to say whether they agreed or disagreed with it.

It’s that longing for my friend along with the frustration of the entire situation that causes me to hang my head low and blink back some tears, “Just let me go, Sidney. You’re not making this better.”
“I need to find a way to make it better though,” he replied as I felt his finger lift my chin up forcing me to meet his eyes. He sighs, “Rach..I meant what I said about not being like one of those guys. It just..the thought of you was killing me, and when you weren’t responding to me..I reacted to someone who was.”
“It’s not like I was ignoring you on purpose.”
“I know. I guess the idea that you weren’t putting all your attention towards me made me feel jealous and a little stupid about the way I feel about you.”
Knowing very well what he was talking about, I still needed clarification. “Sid, what are you trying to say?”

He closed his eyes and breathed heavily as he ran his hand through his hair. “It’s kind of crazy..but every time we’re in the same place, I can’t help but want to never let you go away. You just…I guess you bring out the best of me when you’re around. And then when you’re gone…it’s like I’m constantly trying to figure out what I’m supposed to be doing with my life.”

Shock is beyond what I’m feeling right now. To listen to how much I’ve impacted Sidney is something I hadn’t expected. But what’s even more weird is how he hasn’t done the same for me. Shouldn’t the feeling be mutual? Yeah, he’s cute and one of my good friends, but I wouldn’t say he’s left a mark on me…right?
“Sid…I don’t know what you what me to do here,” I say hesitantly.
His hands begin to run up and down my arms slowly as if that will help put a spell on me, “Give me the chance to show you how I can be a good guy. I know I screwed up, and I’m sorry. I wish I could change what I did, but I can’t. What I can do is pick up the pieces and try to make this work.”

As convincing as he sounds, I can’t help but reject him. “I can’t, Sidney. I just…I feel like this is all sudden and too fast for me.”
He looks in my eyes with determination, “What can I do to prove this to you?”
I pause, “Give me time. Continue to be a good friend to me. I have a feeling I’ll only disappoint you though. I’m not exactly easy to impress.”
Sidney chuckled, “Yeah, I’ve learned that already. But honestly, I’m willing to fight for you. Just…trust me.”
Just as I was about to respond, Michel Therrien poked out of the locker room, “Sid, practice, let’s go!”

Sidney threw his head back and groaned as I grinned.
“You’re being called to duty.”
He grabbed both of my hands and held on tight as we tried to search each other’s minds of what we were thinking. “Will you be at the party next weekend?”
I smirked, “Unless I have something better to do.”
He smiled, “Trust me, you won’t. Just…think about what I said, okay?”
“I can’t guarantee you anything, but I will.”
He squeezed my hands one last time as he walked into the locker room to head to practice.

I sighed heavily. I honestly don’t know what to think about all of this. I have the National Hockey League’s poster boy chasing after me…and yet, I don’t want that. I just never imagined dating him before. So many things would get in the way. With me, there’s school, especially going away to college in a year. Did I want to be attached to someone at home while I was away? With him, there’s so much more. His schedule in general. Especially road games, how would I deal with him not being there all the time? All the attention he gets…would I really be willing to sacrifice some of my privacy? So much of it would eventually get directed towards me. I hated the idea of only being known as “Sidney Crosby’s girlfriend”. No, I am worth more than that than to just be known as a hockey player’s arm candy.

I begin to walk out of the arena and realize that as much as I don’t wanna let him down, there is no way that I could ever date Sidney. I just hope in time that he’ll realize the same towards me and will find another girl who is okay with those sacrifices that I’m not willing to make. In the mean time, I have a friend that I can count on when I need him to be there. Even though this won’t go the way he wants it to, I’m hoping that he will continue to return the favor.

So why aren’t these butterflies going away? I guess I need to pick their wings off.

Chapter Four

Wow, I suck at updating! Sorry about the wait, school has been crazy! But I'm on break so I was excited to update! And thanks for the feedback!



It was a beautiful, summer day. You could hear birds singing, the white lilies dancing with the wind. There wasn’t a cloud in the sky. The grass was greener than ever, and the excitement on people’s faces was contagious as they walked into a building connected to the room that I occupied.

As I continued to look out the window, I couldn’t help myself but wonder what the occasion was.

“They’re ready whenever you are, sweetheart.”

I turned away from the window to see my dad smiling at me with a hint of sadness and fear in his face. He was wearing a black tuxedo that fit him nicely. I became confused. As I started to look around the room, I realized that I was standing in the parlor of my church. I looked to my left where a beautiful bouquet of white roses was laying innocently on the wooden table.

‘I must be at a wedding,’ I thought. I assumed the church asked me to sing again for another ceremony. But I couldn’t help but continue to notice my dad’s look on his face. The kind of look that couldn’t be more proud of you, but at the same time, it looks like he’s about to lose something.

I hesitantly asked, “Who’s getting married?”
My dad’s eyes got wide, and he started laughing. “You’re not that nervous, are you? You act like you haven’t been planning your own wedding for over a year.”

I froze. ‘No way,’ I thought as I slowly looked down at myself and gasped. I was wearing a strapless, white dress with beading across my chest. Right at my waist, the dress was cinched to show off my figure. I lifted up my dress to reveal the short, white heels with crystals circling around the opening of the shoe where my feet occupied. I raised my arms to touch my head only to feel the material of a veil. I finally looked to my left to look into the mirror. Sure enough, it was me in the reflection.

“I’m getting married..”
“Rachel, it’s time to go!”

I turned around towards the door of the parlor where a lady dressed in a suit with a head set smiled. I assumed she was my wedding planner.

I hesitantly took my dad’s arm and held onto it tightly as we walked out of the parlor and towards the back of the church where two closed doors separated the sanctuary. I couldn’t catch my breath.

‘How did this happen? Who’s all here? Where are my bridesmaids? …Who am I getting married to?’

An organ started playing as I continued to hold onto my dad’s arm. The two doors opened, and the shocked look on my face couldn’t be hidden as people awed at me.

On the end of each pew were flowers wrapped around the branches of the poles that held lit candles. The center of the aisle was covered in white rose petals. As my dad and I walked down the aisle, I couldn’t help but notice the tightened grip on my hand. I looked up towards my dad to see him crying. I didn’t know what to do.

I looked to the right to see my family and friends looking at me with adoration. I saw my mother standing in the front pew beaming with pride and crying as well.

But when I looked to my left to see my future family, my vision was blurry. I could make out different figures and different colors of their clothing, but it was all a blur. I immediately thought I had lost my vision, but when I looked towards my family again, my vision was clear.

‘This is so strange,’ I thought and became frustrated and scared. Why could I only see my family and friends clearly?

We then reached towards the end of the aisle. I looked to my right to see my sister as my maid of honor and five of my closest friends standing behind her with excited smiles. I smiled back at them, and then I felt my dad take my hand off of his arm and place it in a strong but gentle hand as it wrapped around mine. I automatically felt electricity as if love had sparked into me suddenly. I looked up to see the man I was to marry.

He was just a blur.

“GOOOOOD MORNINGGG!!”

I instantly woke up to find myself sleeping on the air mattress with my sleeping bag wrapped around me tightly. I looked around the crowded room where other girls were waking up and looked up to see my friend, Samantha smirking at me as she continued to try to get me out of bed.

“It’s time to rise and shine! It’s gonna be ninety-two degrees in good old Tennessee today! A perfect day to work on a home!”
“Five more minutes..” I groaned as I pulled my sleeping bag over my head. My request was declined as the sleeping bag was pulled away from me, and I automatically stood up from the sudden coldness I felt from the room’s air conditioner being blasted way too high.
Samantha snickered, “I love waking you up. It’s the highlight of my day!”
“Pretty soon, the highlight of your day will be trying to wash the paint out of your hair that I’ll dump on you when we get to the work site.”
“You’re so lovely in the morning,” Jen joked with me as she started to get out her clothes for the day and her toothbrush to head to the bathroom. I stuck my tongue out at her as I did the same.

It was our last, full day of mission work in Tennessee. I traveled with my youth group for a week long mission trip to help people in the community. Whether it be traveling to a nursing home to sing worship or to work on people’s own homes, it was a blessing to give back to people who were so gracious for us coming to help.

The lady’s home that my group has been working on needed a new coat of paint badly as well as some work needed done inside. So yesterday, we scraped off the old paint and painted one new coat. Today, we were going back to complete the second coat.

As Jen and I walked into the bathroom of the community center we were staying at, I couldn’t help but wonder about that dream I had. It was so weird. What was it trying to tell me? That my future husband is closer than I think? I’m not even seventeen yet (less than two months away though). Why in the world would I have a dream about my wedding?

“You seem lost in thought. What’s up?” Jen asked as she began to brush her teeth.
“It’s nothing .. just this weird dream I had last night. I was getting married, but I couldn’t see who I was being married to. He was blurry.”
“That is weird,” Jen replied as she finished brushing her teeth and went onto pulling her hair up. “What do you think could have triggered that?”
“I don’t know,” I replied as I washed my face.
“Got it bad for a boy?” she asked with a grin.
“No,” I replied honestly. “I don’t like any guys right now. I’m just trying to focus on myself and what I want.”
“Well, that’s a good thing,” Jen said. “It doesn’t hurt to have a boyfriend though.”
“I know, but when I think about it, if I’m eventually going to be with someone, I might as well enjoy being on my own while I can.”
“Wish I had that outlook on life,” Jen responded. “I admire you for that though. Good for you.”


“..and never forget what you have done here. You have left such an impact on the community that they will be forever grateful towards your hard work and compassion for serving. I wish you all a safe trip home, and thanks for an awesome week!”

The group of us cheered as we started to say our goodbyes to the other groups that had worked with us. This week has been such an eye-opening experience, and I’m even more thankful for what I have at home. Once our goodbyes are said and the final pictures are taken, we are in the van heading for the beach to relax after a hard week of work. Our youth leader hands us our cell phones back when we reach the van. When we had reached the site, we had to hand them in so that we could focus on what we were there to do.

I turned on my phone not expecting to receive any messages. Everyone knew that I was on this trip and that I wouldn’t be able to get a hold of.

10 new messages.

“What the heck?” I said out loud.

I went to my inbox to see who had texted me during the week and hoped that none of the messages contained bad news.

All ten of them were from Sidney.

I scrolled down to the first one he sent me and opened it. It was a picture of the ocean at sunset with the message “Wish you were here.” Ryan and Abby had told me that they were going to the Dominican Republic with Sid, some of his friends from home, and a couple of the guys from the team. They had asked me to come with them, but I declined since the mission trip was the same week. I couldn’t help but smile at the text and got excited to read the other ones.
“Hey, what are you up to?”
“The bar I’m at just played a Justin Timberlake song. I’m dreading the day his new album comes out since I’m sure that’s all you’ll listen to for the next year.”
“Are you getting my messages?”
I rolled my eyes. I had told Ryan and Abby that I most likely wouldn’t be able to answer my phone throughout the week. I take it that they didn’t pass the message on to Sid.

I read quickly through the rest of the messages, but when I reached the last one, I was caught off guard.

“I wish you knew.”

Wish I knew what? I immediately became worried. Was he okay? The message was sent last night, but I felt like it was too late and awkward for me to respond to him. I really needed to call Abby to see what was going on, but I couldn’t have this conversation with fourteen other people listening to me in the van.

We finally arrived at the beach. I laid my towel on the sand, laid on my stomach and dialed her number.

“Hey girl!! How’s your trip going?!” Abby answered.
“Hey, it was awesome! I loved every minute of it. I’m kinda sad that it’s over to be honest.”
“Well, there’s always plenty of opportunities to go on more. You have to tell me everything that you did, what you saw, how many nails you hammered in your hand..”
“Shut up, that didn’t happen!” I responded, but then got to the point of my phone call. “Abby, .. Is everything with Sid all right?”
She paused, “Yeah .. he seems to be having a good time down here .. why?”
“He sent me a lot of messages while I didn’t have my phone during the week. There’s nothing wrong with them until one he sent me last night that said ‘I wish you knew.’”
Abby sighed, “I knew he would do something stupid.”
I became confused, “What do you mean?”
“Rach .. he really misses you..”
I shrugged, “Well, I mean that’s nice. He’ll be back soon enough for me to prank him again.”
“I don’t think you understand what I’m trying to say. He really misses you. He’s been trying to get your attention for so long and doesn’t understand why you’re not getting it..”
“Getting what?” I asked irritated.
“He really likes you. Ever since you guys met, I think he’s had it bad for you, but now it’s worse. He says he’s tried dropping hints to you about his feelings, but you never seem to get what he’s trying to say. Which I said to him that he personally needs to use the balls he has to tell you how he feels if this is gonna go anywhere. So when you weren’t responding to him throughout the week, he thought that you were ignoring him to get him off your back. Ryan and I told him that you probably weren’t allowed to use your phone, but he didn’t listen. Needless to say..” she stopped hesitantly.

I took all of this information in slowly and unsure. People had pointed out many times that maybe Sidney was looking for more than friendship, but I just ignored it saying that how we acted was just the way we were around each other. But everything makes so much sense now: the texting, the flirty gestures, the whole thing with Aaron, our conversation on the porch..

I was the one who had no idea.

“I’m not sure if I should be telling you this yet alone everything else I just said-”
“Just spit it out, Abby,” I replied nervously.
Abby sighed, “We were at a bar last night. He had a little too much to drink, and this girl casually bumped into him at the bar pretending that she didn’t know who he was which was a complete act of bullshit. Sidney was still upset about you, and I think he used this girl to drown out the feelings he had about everything. She was paying attention to him and when you do that to any drunk guy, it never ends without pleasure.
“What are you trying to say?” I asked even though I was sure I knew the answer.
“I’m not saying this is exactly what happened. But he left with her, and they came out of his room this morning to walk to the pool area. But I’m pretty sure they slept together.”

I immediately became angry. I shouldn’t be this upset. It’s not like we were dating or anything. Yet, just because he wasn’t getting his way, he just moved on to someone who was an easy lay because he was Sidney Crosby.

Exactly the kind of guy I thought he was.

“Rach, are you there? ..I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have told you any of this.”
I quickly wiped a tear, “No, I appreciate that you told me. Because now I know who he really is. And I thought he was a friend of mine.”
“He is, Rach. Please don’t cut him off. I’m outside watching him with the group right now and he’s staying as far away from the girl as he can. He looks guilty and disgusted with himself. He was drunk -”
“Being drunk isn’t an excuse for his actions, Abby! If he’s doing this right now, what would he do if we did get in a relationship?! I would never trust him!”
“Rach, just calm down. You can’t let Sid know that you know about this. It would kill him.”
“Good, he needs to know that he can’t have it all. Listen, Abby, I really appreciate you telling me, but I’m gonna go. I’m not mad at you. I just..hate him.”
“Don’t hang up -”
Too late. I put my phone back into my bag that I carried with me to the beach. I stood up and looked towards the ocean. I walked until my feet touched the water and breathed. I hate that he was making me feel this way. I just had one of the most amazing experiences of my life and he took that joy away from me.

My group of friends yelled at me to come in deeper with them. I joined them and as the waves hit me, I let them wash away the friendship that Sidney and I had and what we maybe could have had.

Chapter Three

Hello to everyone who is reading! Thanks for your feedback, it is greatly appreciated and helps me determine where the story is going to go! Unfortunately, classes started today for me so there won't be updates every day, but I'm going to do my best to keep the story alive!


April 16, 2006

Isn’t it crazy how fast time goes? The end of the season is only a couple of days away for the guys as they give everything that they have left in them to at least have a decent ending. Of course, that wouldn’t give the team a spot in the playoffs that they so badly strived to be in. It’s hard watching the team lose game after game with a win here and there, especially if you personally know most of the team. And hanging out with the guys after ..you better put on your armor cause you never know what kind of mood they’re going to be in when they walk out of the locker room.

It’s weird that at the end of every season, I reflect on what’s happened and how I’ve changed. I’d like to say that I’ve stayed the same, just grown a little. I’ve made friends and I’ve lost friends. Such is life. But I’d like to say that the friends I have on the team are ones that I absolutely must hold onto. I don’t know what it is, but I just get the feeling that I’m going to need these people more than ever in the future.

During the season, Veronique (or Vero) and me have become much closer, so close that I consider her one of my best friends. It wasn’t that we didn’t like each other before, it’s just that we never clicked until this season that we were crazy to not be friends. Getting closer to Vero meant getting closer to Marc who is quite the comedian. I always thought Marc was a little shy and quiet, but once you get to know him, it’s hard to get him to shut up. His impersonations had me breathing for air - whether it was a skit from Saturday Night Live or trying to be Ron Burgendy.

“Okay, how many times have we watched this movie? Stop quoting every single line, Marc!” Vero shouted as she slapped her boyfriend’s arm.
“‘I DON‘T KNOW WHAT WE‘RE YELLING ABOUT!’” Max quoted from the movie jokingly.

All of the guys laughed in response while the girls just rolled their eyes. Not that I’m saying I hate Anchorman, I think it’s hilarious. However, when half the team is quoting the movie the entire time, it kind of ruins the movie.

“‘I love carpet,’” Colby started.
“‘I love desk,’” Marc said.
“‘I love lamp!’” Sidney finished.
“And I’d love it if you’d shut up!” I replied as I tried to act annoyed.
“What? You don’t like hearing my angelic voice?” Sid joked.
“Do I ever?”
“Hey Bonnie and Clyde, both of you shut it,” Colby said as he threw a pillow at Sid. “The best part’s about to come on and I don‘t wanna hear you two bickering about who‘s prettier!”

I snickered as Sidney raised an eyebrow at me and lightly hit me with the pillow. Out of all of the people that I have become closer to on the team, I am the closest with Sid. I’m sure that our age helps since we’re only two years apart from each other, but we just naturally have fun with each other. We always pick on each other - such as when I watch the team practice, I always try to distract Sid by either waving my arms frantically with a goofy face behind the glass or by simply chanting, “Crosby sucks!” The first couple of times I did those things, he wasn’t very happy with me and claimed that this was his job I was fooling around with. However, he lightened up and stopped caring when in response, I sprayed my bottle of silly string on his back while he was waiting to take his turn in practice.

My phone went off, signaling that I had a new text message.

When are you going to talk to him?

It was from my best friend Kelly Lipa. I knew what she was talking about and I was trying to avoid the subject.

When I made the school musical in January, my character was matched with another guy who just happened to be very attractive. His name is Aaron Crowder. He is a sophomore who plays on the soccer team which makes him very muscular. He wasn’t cocky like any other jock in our high school and had a hell of a singing voice. I was nervous about something as simple as sitting on his lap during one of our duets, but he smiled at me warmly and said, “You’re not gonna hurt me, and I won’t hurt you. Trust me.”

And with those two words, I automatically developed a crush. I usually never developed feelings for a guy until I truly got to know him or until someone actually asked me out. However, Aaron had completely taken over my mind. We would constantly flirt back and forth in rehearsals which in return, rumors started flying through school about us not only dating on stage, but off stage as well. We would joke about it and laugh it off, but deep down inside, I really prayed that it could become a reality.

It seemed like it was becoming one. The last night of the show, we gave it our all on the last time that we sang our duet. Now, normally when the song ended, I would just sit on Aaron’s lap and rest my head on his shoulder (as our director told us to ..not that I was objecting). However, this last performance, as I rested my head on his shoulder, he turned his head and kissed me on the cheek. My eyes went wide as the lights on the stage dimmed. We had never rehearsed that. That had never been a part of the song before. What was he trying to say?

The only response I could return at the time was a giggle. But as soon as I got off stage, I started skipping towards the dressing room to change costumes for the next scene that I was supposed to appear in. Aaron and I never talked about what the whole ‘kiss on the cheek’ thing was about. We continued to hang out and he started coming over my house after school. When we were by ourselves one day, he reached for my hand and held it the entire time he was there as we watched a movie.

As much as I wanted to keep this to myself since Aaron and I had never actually discussed what we were, I couldn’t hold it in any longer. Soon, my mother, Kelly, and Vero knew all about Aaron ..along with the rest of the team when Marc ’accidentally’ overheard one of our conversations and spread the news to the entire team. The guys immediately wanted to know who Aaron was, if he had a job, what his intentions were, etc.

“We’re not even officially dating yet. I don’t even know what we are! For all I know, we could just still be friends!”
“Seems like it’s heading that way though! He must be so dreamy!” Colby said with starry eyes.
I hit him, “Shut up! You’re just jealous that you can’t get Mel to think about you that way!”
“Ooh!” All of the guys in the locker room responded ..except for Sid. He just continued to stare down at his skates as he tied them to get ready for practice.
“Well, listen Rach. I’m glad for you and all, even though you could have had me,” Max said as he pointed at himself, “but I can’t say that on behalf of everyone in the locker room.”
The room suddenly became silent as everyone turned their heads towards the stall behind me. Sidney glared at Max as he finished tying his skates. He then grabbed his stick and a roll of tape and walked towards a more private area of the locker room where he was hidden.
“You’re an idiot. You know that, right?” Vero asked Max.
“What? What did I say?” Max said trying to act innocent as he shrugged it off and finished getting ready for practice.
“What was that all about?” I asked Vero. “Did Sid make a face behind my back or something?”
Vero chuckled, “No, you just missed an inside joke between him and Max. You wouldn’t understand. Let’s go sit in the stands so we can think of ways to throw the boys off of their game.”
I agreed, but as we walked out of the locker room, I couldn’t help but to look back only to find Sidney looking at me until he blushed and walked back towards his locker.

Was he mad about Aaron? Did he not like him or something?

“Are you gonna answer your phone or do you like the ringtone you picked out so much?”
I came back into focus as I looked at Sid as he held my phone in his hand. I looked at the screen to see who it was.

Well speak of the devil.

“Hello?”
“Hey, can you talk?” Aaron answered.
“Yeah, of course! Hold on,” I replied as I got off of the couch and tip-toed my way onto the Lemieux porch, but not without a couple of whistles and kissing sounds from the guys.
“Okay, sorry about that. Just hanging out with a couple of friends. What’s up?”
“Rach, I don’t know if you’ve noticed, but the rumors about us haven’t stopped even though the musical has.”
I rolled my eyes, “That’s just high school, Aaron. We just have to ignore it. Everyone will be gossiping about another person soon so don’t worry about it.”
Aaron sighed, “But I am worried about it. Because they’re not true.”
I froze. “..Yeah ..I guess they’re not ..I mean ..damn it, Aaron! What’s going on between us?”
“What are you talking about?”
“You should know. You flirt with me, you hold my hand, you kiss me on the cheek! What is all of this leading to?”
There was a long pause on the other end of the line. I wasn’t sure if he hung up, but I was about to.
“Rachel, you know I really care about you. Its just ..everyone’s watching us. I don’t like that. I wanted us to be private, but I don’t think that’s gonna happen.
“Who cares who’s watching?! None of that should matter!”
“You’re right. It shouldn’t matter. God, that’s what I love about you so much. You’re just so down-to-earth and you don’t deal with this high school drama bullshit.”
“So what’s the problem?” I asked as I closed my eyes and cringed, immediately regretting it.
“The problem ..is that I think I’m in love with someone else.”

I felt as if my heart hit the floor and was stomped on until it was completely dead. Well, that’s a way to win a girl.

“So I guess that settles it then. And to think I actually thought you were a nice guy, too.”
“Rachel, let me explain what -”
“No! You let me explain! Let me explain how you basically led me to believe that we were gonna be dating! Okay, you don’t show affection towards me and then put on the same exact show for another girl! It doesn’t work that way! I don’t care what grade you are in, you should still be mature enough to realize how to treat a girl! My one-year-old cousin treats me better than you do and he’s puked on me! So thanks for the game you had me play with you, but you lose,” I say as I shut my phone and toss it carelessly where it lands on the concrete porch with a loud thud.

As much as I was hurt by Aaron’s stupidity, I refused to shed a tear. He wasn’t worth it. No guy was. Why do I even bother? Men seem to always get their way with girls, and when they got what they wanted, they moved on to the next girl. I try so hard to remind myself that I’m still young and that I have plenty of time to find someone. But then I shudder in terror of always being the bridesmaid and never the bride. I didn’t want to be the last one in my group of friends to get married. But right now, I just don’t see how that’ll happen.

I continued to stare into the backyard when I heard the porch door open and shut behind me. I didn’t have to guess who it was as I felt his presence next to me. The smell of his cologne disrupted my train of thought, and I smiled.

My best friend.

“You missed all of the guys singing ‘Afternoon Delight.’”
I chuckled, “Did Colby hit the high notes this time?”
“He tried.”

We both laughed thinking about our friend trying to sing, but then we were silent again. I knew what he came out here for. He wanted to know what happened. To see if I was okay. Even though I tried to hide what I was feeling inside, Sidney knew better. He knew better than to believe the mask on my face.

I sighed, “I was basically a piece of clothing to him. He tried me on to see if I fit him well. And obviously, I didn’t so I’ve been tossed to the side and put on clearance.”
Sidney shook his head, “You’re worth a lot more than that. It’s his loss.”
He looked at me as I just sighed heavily, “Don’t let him get to you, Rach. There are plenty of guys that would do anything to have a chance with you.”
I rolled my eyes and turned to him, “Yeah, I’m sure there are. C’mon, Sid! No offense, but all that guys are after are girls with great bodies for a one night stand and girls who will do anything they want them to. I’m not like that. I refuse to give myself completely away to someone who just plans on passing me by in the end.”
“Not all guys are like that.”
“Oh, really? Well, I can’t wait until I’m proven wrong then because that in itself will be a miracle.”
“Do you think I’m like that?”

My eyes got wide as I looked at him. He had this look as if he was just insulted. Can’t say that I blame him - I basically just criticized the entire male population.

“..I don’t know. I’ve never seen you with a girl to know.”
“Well I’m not,” he said as he leaned against the railing. “What I look for in a girl is independence. But not so much that she can’t lean on me for help. I wanna be able to take care of someone and show her that the world’s not as bad as it seems.”
I smiled, “Well, whoever that girl is will be very lucky.”
Sidney looked out into the yard, “Hopefully ..if she ever figures out that I’m already here.”
“Well, if she hasn’t figured it out by now, then she’s either crazy or it’s just not the right time. You’re a great guy - she must have blinders on.”
He chuckled bitterly and turned to me, “You have no idea.”

We just looked at each other. Now, call me insane, but it can’t be that hard for Sidney Crosby to find a girl who equally wants him back. There’s girls across Pittsburgh who desperately try to find his house number on Google. There’s girls who wait for hours after a game just to catch a sight of him. Hell, he’s got people from Canada begging him to marry their daughter. Sure, he’s got to watch out for the gold diggers and other bimbos, but it can’t be that hard for him to find someone who could care less about the fame and the money.

Just as I was about to respond, my attention diverted towards the water that separated Sidney and me from where we were standing. I quickly stood back even further as I turned to see Ryan with a water gun in his hand.

“Would you care to explain yourself?” I asked annoyed.
Ryan laughed, “It got your attention, didn’t it? C’mon, the movie’s over and we’re about to play Apples to Apples!”
“We’ll be in there in a minute,” I said as I shooed him off into the house. “One of these days, I’m just gonna snap on him and it won’t be pretty.”
“You mean you haven’t done that yet?”
“Pretty damn close..”
“Well, let me know when that happens so I know when to yell at him for all of the bouncy balls falling out of my helmet when I went to put it on.”

I couldn’t help but laugh out loud at that. I could see Sidney standing in the locker room pissed not only because there were bouncy balls hitting him in the head, but just at the mere fact that someone touched his stuff before a game. The boy’s superstitions were wacky, but they seemed to be working for him.

I looked at him sadly, “Do you have to go home this summer?”
He nodded, “As much as I wish I was here until June, I do miss my family and friends. I feel like I’m missing Taylor growing up so I’m really anxious to just go home and hang out with her again.”
“That’ll be nice. It’s always so weird when you guys go home for the summer. It seems as if there’s no one around, and I get bored easily.”
“So you’re saying that we’re not that bad to hang out with, eh?”
I grinned, “Nope, especially when I can make fun of you for your accent.”
He rolled his eyes, “It’s not that bad.”
“Say ‘about.’”
“About,” he said as I started to laugh.

He threw his hands up in frustration as I walked closer and threw my arms around him for a hug. Sidney seemed shocked and hesitant at first before he returned the hug.
“I’m gonna miss you,” I said as I squeezed him tighter. “Don’t change that much.”
“I won’t. Don’t forget about me - I’m just a call away even though I know you hate talking on the phone.”
“Okay,” I laughed as I let go of him and started to head inside. When I was about to close the door, I turned around to see that he wasn’t following me. I assumed that he was going to stay outside for a little longer.

“Hey Sid?”
He turned to look at me, “Yeah?”
I smiled, “I hope whoever she is figures it out soon.”
I shut the door and left Sidney alone on the porch.

“I hope so, too,” he whispered.

Chapter Two

“Happy Birthday to you, Happy Birthday to you..”

Everyone at the table was singing to me while I tried to pretend that I wasn’t there. I had told Ryan and Abby plenty of times in the car that if anyone even mentioned a hint to any of the servers in the restaurant that it was my birthday, I would make sure that their face would have a lovely conversation with the cake.

Apparently I’m not very threatening. Not even to keep Sidney Crosby away.

Granted, I thought for sure that he wasn’t going to show up after our meeting at the arena. I didn’t blame him if he didn’t come. I wouldn’t want to hang around someone I just met who already thought so low of me. Nevertheless, I secretly hoped that he had gotten over it and would still come so I could at least apologize to him for my not-so-friendly behavior. After I was certain that he wasn’t coming, Sidney walked into the restaurant towards our table. He apologized for being the last one to arrive due to the fact that he was still trying to find his way around Pittsburgh and all the ramps Downtown didn’t help his horrible sense of direction. As he sat down between Marc and Max, he just looked at me and smiled. I smiled back, hoping that maybe he would get the hint that I appreciated him being here.

“Make a wish and blow out the candles, chicka!” Abby said as she clapped her hands excitedly.

I stared at the sixteen candles in front of me. I wasn’t going to be ridiculous and pray that I got a car or to meet Justin Timberlake (although that would be amazing and I’d probably faint). What did I really want for myself? I looked around the table at all of the people who joined me for my birthday. At that moment, I felt really blessed to know that people cared about me.

I just want to be happy, I thought as I blew out the candles with clapping and cheering in the background.

Once all the cake was eaten, some of the guys went up to the bar to get a drink. Abby and I began talking at the table when I heard the chair next to me move. I turned to look as Sidney sat down next to me. Abby grinned, “If you’ll excuse me, I hear a strawberry margarita calling my name.”

Well this is awkward, I thought as we sat in silence until we were sure she couldn’t hear us.

Sidney then pulled out a small gift box from his jacket pocket and handed it to me, “Happy Birthday.”
“You didn’t have to get me anything,” I replied, shocked that he would. “You barely know me.”
“I also know that it’s rude to come empty handed to a birthday party as well. Just open it.”

I was nervous to open it. What was inside? It couldn’t possibly be jewelry, that’d be way out of line. And if it was, what do I say to the guy?

I finally unwrapped the gift and took the lid off of the box to find two different crystal-like key chains. One was simply my first initial ‘R’ while the other one was a rectangular photo frame.
“I..uh..thought you’d maybe like to make your set of keys not so boring when you begin driving,” Sidney said, nervous that I didn’t like the gift. “I know it’s kinda lame-”
“No, not at all,” I replied honestly. “I think they’re very thoughtful and cute! Picking out the picture is going to be a tough decision though. Thank you, these are really nice.”
Sidney smirked, “To be honest with you, I needed help from Nathalie to make sure I didn’t pick out anything too out of the ordinary.”
“Who?” I asked puzzled.
“Mario’s wife..”
“Oh, right! I forgot you were living with them. How’s that been going?”
He shrugged his shoulders, “So far, so good. It’s kinda weird staying there with their kids around the house, but they’re a nice family. I’ve never really felt unwelcome there, but I do miss my family a lot.”

As I watched him stare into space, I realized how hard the move must have been on him. Yeah, he was living his dream, but he also had to sacrifice many things as well. Not being able to see his family, his friends, going to college, and his privacy. All gone with a simple signature on a contract. I immediately began to feel more ashamed of how I had treated him this afternoon.

“I’m sorry about how I acted towards you today..it was completely uncalled for and you didn’t deserve that.”
Sidney looked back at me, a little shocked at first, but then grinned, “It’s okay. To be fair, I really did smell like dog sweat.”
I laughed with my head down, “Yeah, glad you clean up well.”
“So..you’re in high school..a junior, right?”
I nodded my head, “Yeah, I can’t wait to get out of that place.”
“Trust me, graduation was a memorable moment, but don’t wish it away so fast. I wish I could go back in time and do some of the normal things that I should have been doing in high school.”
I looked at him weird, “Like what? You played hockey. I imagine you were quite the jock.”
Sidney rolled his eyes, “Yeah, if you like everyone sucking up to you just because you’re breaking school records. I was bullied by some of my teammates just because I was beating them in points and getting all the attention. And then all of the girls tried to cling onto me like a hook. It was hard to tell who really wanted to be my friend. And then my hockey schedule made it nearly impossible to go to dances, football games, just being a teenager.”
“..Wow. I had no idea.”
“Eh, I got over it. There’s nothing I’d rather be doing than what I’m here for now so I’d like to think that I overcame all of my obstacles.”
I looked at him, “Sidney, how did you know that hockey was it? Y’know, was there ever a doubt in your mind that you weren’t supposed to?”
He shook his head, “Not really. I thought about going to college for a little..especially during the lockout, but I figured that I would just be playing hockey there anyways and that the dream would only get bigger and harder to reach for if I didn’t go for it now.”
“You’re so lucky. You had your life basically laid out for you when you were two years old. I can’t even decide on a career yet alone a college.”
“Well, what do you like to do?”
Sing, I thought. Write music, help out other people through music.
“I dance at a local studio ..but I really can’t see myself wearing a pair of tap shoes the rest of my life. I like to help others out a lot through my youth group. I like kids and have thought about teaching.”
He raised an eyebrow, “But there’s something else you’d rather be doing..”
I froze. How could he see right through me? I just met this guy and he already knows I’m holding something back. Damn it, am I that easy to read?
“Well..I..-”
“Rachel! I won, baby!” Max said as he put his arm around my shoulders.
“How many times must I tell you, Max? Don’t call me baby. And what did you win?” I asked annoyed.
“I beat Bugsy, Fleury, and Army on how many of those mints that they gave us after our meal I can fit in my mouth!”
“Good Lord,” I rolled my eyes. “Next time, you should challenge yourself to count to one hundred under water.”
Max pouted, “I thought you loved me!”
I smirked, “I like you when you’re quiet and the only time that happens is when you’re not around.”
Max walked over to Sidney, “You see what I have to deal with? Can’t even get the girl to go on a date with me.”
“Max, I’m just not interested in dating anyone right now,” I said, and couldn’t help but notice the disappointment on Sidney’s face. “But if you always need a date, you can just pick any girl outside waiting for you after a game.”
“I tried that once. Turns out the girl just wanted a ride home since she took a bus to the game.”
I couldn’t help but laugh as the rest of the crew came back. “You ready to go home?”

I nodded at Ryan as we all gathered our things and headed for the parking lot. I said goodbye to most of the crew and thanked them for the gifts and their company. Ryan and Abby began to load my presents in the car which left Sidney and me standing alone in the parking lot.
“I’m really happy that you came after all tonight. I was afraid I scared you away.”
Sidney chuckled, “Nah, I needed to get out of the house. Plus, it doesn’t hurt to try to get to know my teammates better along with other people as well..”
“..Yeah,” I fidgeted. “Listen, if you ever need someone to talk to ..and it doesn’t have to be a serious conversation. I know Pittsburgh pretty well living here my whole life. I could give you some tips and suggestions on where to go..”
“Yeah, I’d like that. Can I see your phone?”
I looked at him puzzled, “My phone?”
“Well, yeah, that’s usually a main resource to keep in contact with people,” he smirked.
Duh, ya big dummy, I thought. “Oh, right. I don’t know what I was thinking,” I replied as I handed my phone to him. He saved his number on my phone and then called himself.

Ryan honked the horn, “Hey, you two! Let’s speed it up a bit! Normally, I wouldn’t stop this, but Mr. Kenzington might take a baseball bat to my head if she’s not home on time!”
I groaned, “I swear, Ryan’s the big brother I never had.”
Sidney chuckled, “If only you were so lucky.”
We smiled at each other. This was weird. I couldn’t help but notice the nervousness I had whenever I was around a guy I liked. But I had just met Sidney. There’s absolutely no way I could have feelings for him and I never would. It just wasn’t going to happen. He’s the reason the NHL is slowly coming back to its popularity. I could never date someone with that much of a hype yet alone the schedule he has to live by.

Nope, that would never happen. But having a good guy friend could help with potential boyfriends in the future. He seemed to be like the type of guy that would honestly tell me what to watch out for in a guy. Potentially, he seemed like another big brother to me.
“So..I guess I’ll see you later,” I said as I held out my hand.
He smiled and accepted it, “Thanks. Glad to know I have another friend now. Let me know whenever you’re planning on another visit to the arena.”
“I will,” I promised.

We said our final goodbyes as we got into our cars that would drive us home. So my birthday wasn’t bad after all. It was actually fun. I enjoyed hanging out with everyone tonight. And surprisingly, I really enjoyed getting to know Sidney a little bit better. Maybe he’s not a stuck up hockey player after all.
“So,” Abby turned in her seat, “looks like you and Sidney were getting along real well.”
“Yeah, he doesn’t seem so cocky after all.”
“I told you,” Abby said. “Just give him a chance and you will see.”
“See what?” I asked.
“Oh, nothing at all,” she mused. “I can just tell that you guys are going to be great friends.”
“So, Rach,” Ryan said as he looked into the rearview mirror, “what do you say your best friend Ryan takes you to get your permit tomorrow?”
“Ugh,” I replied. I still didn’t look over the damn driver’s manual. What a great ending to my sixteenth birthday..studying on a Friday night. Great.

Chapter One

September 2005

“So your mom’s been on your case about taking the SAT’s?”
“Yeah, and it’s bothering the crap out of me. I took the practice test last year and I didn’t do bad, but it’s almost as if you need to be Bill Gates in order to figure out what answer to put down.”
“Glad I never had to go through that..” Abby replied as we looked through the clothing rack in Bebe. Looked as in Abby bought anything she liked and I just stared at the clothing wishing I could actually afford it.
“Aren’t you lucky..” I grumbled.
“Rachel, you’re a smart girl. You’d get into college without even taking the SAT’s.”
“If only that were true. I don’t even know where I wanna go yet. My dad’s been asking me about college since eighth grade.”
“Well, what do you wanna do?”
“Well, I’d really love to do something with music -”
“You should totally audition for American Idol! You’d have Simon on his knees begging for you to serenade him!”
I looked at her weird, “Okay..that’s not going to happen.”
“Come on, Rach! I know you can sing! You have a hell of a voice that has Mariah Carey running for her money!”
Try telling this all to my mother, I thought.“I was thinking along the lines of music therapy.”

You see, my mom and I have been fighting about what career I want to choose for me lately. Music has always been such a huge part of my life. Not only did I sing, but I also have been playing the piano for years now. When no one’s home, I let all my emotions out whether good or bad. I also have begun writing my own songs based on past experiences. Boys, friends, family, etc. Nothing was left hidden between me and my diary of music. But whenever I even mentioned the word ‘music’ in my career, my mom immediately rejected the idea.
“You’re not the next Britney Spears,” she would say.
I sure hope not the way she’s heading down her life, I thought. “Mom, I don’t want fame and all of that. I just want to help other people out with a gift that I love.”
“You can do that through teaching. You’d be helping out students everyday by teaching them everything they need to know in order to succeed in life.”
Great, a school teacher. Not that I didn’t oppose the idea, but I know how kids can be to teachers. I’m not gonna lie, whenever there’s a substitute, I join in the usual pranks and think it’s hilarious. But then I end up feeling guilty about it and realize that that could be me in the next six years.

“That sounds like a career you could convince your mom of,” Abby replied as she held up a top that looked like only Lindsay Lohan could fit into. “Do you like this shirt? I think it would be great for clubbing!”
I just nodded and continued to look through the clothing rack.
“Remember that if you see something you like in any store that we go into, let me know and it’s yours.”
“Abby, I’m not gonna let you do that-”
“It’s your birthday for Pete’s sake! I’m supposed to buy you presents!”

Today was my sixteenth birthday. I have to admit, I am excited about going to get my permit so I can finally drive, but I didn’t like how everyone just threw presents at me. Sure, they were nice and I ended up liking them a lot, but I just feel guilty about people spending their money on me. I’m very independent and I don’t accept charity.
Abby pulled out a black halter dress, “This would look so cute for your birthday dinner tonight!” She shoved the dress at me, “Go try it on ..and if you look at the price tag, I’ll slap you.”

Not wanting to make a scene in the middle of the store, I obliged and went to a dressing room to try it on. When I finished putting the dress on, I actually liked myself in it. It fit my body perfectly and didn’t show any imperfections that I didn’t want to be showing. I opened the dressing room door for Abby to see and she immediately squealed in delight saying, “Damn, you’re sexy! It’s a winner!” Once I changed into my regular clothes again, we went to the register and Abby paid for my dress not accepting any arguments from me. Just as we walked out of the store, her cell phone rang.

“Hey, baby! … Yeah, we’re just shopping at the mall. I just bought Rach this cute dress for dinner tonight! ..What? I thought you were getting a ride home from Max ..What do you mean he needs to go suit shopping? It’s not like we’re eating with the President! ..Okay, all right, but only because I love you ..shut up. Okay, love you too, bye,” Abby said as she shut her phone. She sighed, “We have to go pick Ryan up from the arena. Max decided that he doesn’t have the right suit for your dinner tonight so he left Ryan looking for a ride home.”
“That’s fine with me. But exactly who is all coming to this dinner?” I asked. I had already celebrated with my family the night before because Ryan and Abby insisted on taking me out to dinner along with some of the guys from the team.
“Well there’s us, Max, Marc and V, Colby and Mel, and a couple of the other younger players from the team.”
I grunted as I hopped into the passenger seat as we drove off to the arena. It’s not that I didn’t want to hang out with any of them, it’s just that I felt like I didn’t know them as well as Abby and Ryan did. And now they were coming out to celebrate my birthday? It just felt weird to me.

Twenty minutes later, we arrived at Mellon Arena and parked. We walked into the arena and headed towards the waiting area when all of a sudden, I got attacked with a kickball to my forehead.
“What the hell?!” I answered as I rubbed my forehead.
“HAPPY BIRTHDAY RACHEL!” Colby screamed as he picked me up and spun me around as I protested for him to put me down. I hit him several times before he finally agreed to do so. “Damn, you hit like a girl,” he joked as he pouted at his right shoulder.
“You know, for it being my birthday, you’re being very mean to me,” I grinned at him.
“If I wasn’t mean to you, that means I wouldn’t like you. I always am a little rough with my friends, but it’s all out of fun. Although, I don’t think my new roommate on the road has gotten that yet..”
“What did you do to the poor boy now?” Abby asked as she rolled her eyes.
“All I did was-”
“Army, if you put shaving cream in my skates again, I swear I’ll take one of your hockey sticks and shove it up your-” he stopped in his tracks as soon as he saw that he had more than Colby as an audience.

So this was the talk of the town. I was finally going to meet Sidney Crosby. It wasn’t as if I already had my assumptions about him already, but that last comment had my eyebrows raising. Sure, I’ve heard a lot worse from the guys, but Sidney needed to work up to that level of insulting. I quickly eyed him from head to toe and ..wait, is he staring at me? I looked right into his hazel eyes, and we connected for a second before he quickly looked away realizing that I caught him.

Who did he think he was?

“Sid, you don’t threaten me at all! This is only the beginning of a B-E-A-utiful friendship!” Colby replied as he pulled Sidney next to him and had him in a quick head lock before Sidney jerked away. He then retreated back to my eyes again as I stared right back at him. If he wanted to play this game, then I wasn’t backing down.

Abby noticed our silent interaction with each other and smirked as she introduced us, “Sidney, have you met Rachel yet?”
He continued to stare at me until Colby waved his hand in front of his face, “Hellooo?? Is anyone alive in there?”
Sidney quickly stepped back into reality, “It’s nice to meet you, Rachel..” he replied as he offered his hand.
I looked at it almost afraid to touch it, but agreed to shake his hand. “You too.”
“Y’know, Sid, it’s Rachel’s birthday today-” Abby started, but was then cut off.
“Happy Birthday,” he breathed.
The three of us looked at Sidney as if he was nuts. I wasn’t sure if he was having an asthma attack or if he was just plain psychotic. He then blushed, but failed at trying to hide it. Man, this boy needed help.

“Abby, baby,” Ryan said as he entered the most awkward conversation alive. He kissed Abby and looked at the people around him. “Did I miss something?”
Colby looked at Abby, “Yeah, we were just telling Sid that it was Rachel’s birthday and that we’re all going out to celebrate tonight.”
Abby winked at Ryan and he immediately knew what the two of them were up to, “Oh yeah, you should join us Sid!”
“What?” Sidney and I responded at the same time both in shock of the invitation.
“Yeah, it’ll be a bunch of us young guys at this restaurant downtown. We’re just going to celebrate this young lady’s aging!” Ryan said as he looked at me with a smirk on his face.
Abby continued, “Yeah, we could drive you if you want.”
Are you people out of your minds?! I am NOT sitting in the same car with this lunatic!
Sidney responded, “That won’t be necessary. I have my own car here so I can just meet you guys there. What time?”
I cursed the Three Musketeers inside. I knew what they were up to and I didn’t like it at all. I would not be a puppeteer of their matchmaking game.
“7:00,” Ryan replied as he gave Sidney the address to the restaurant.
“Cool, thanks guys. I guess I better go get out of this nasty gear and get moving then,” Sid replied as he looked down at himself. He was still wearing his under armor and shorts from practice.
“Yeah, it usually helps making friends when you don’t smell like dog sweat,” I responded as I quickly covered up my mouth. Now, usually I could talk peacefully with people that I couldn’t get along with without any resentment said from me. So to say that I was completely horrified at what I had just said to Sidney was an understatement.
Colby, Ryan, and Abby looked at me with wide eyes. Sidney stood there shocked, but then chuckled, “You’re not the first person that’s told me I smell bad. But I promise I don’t smell like this all the time.” He then put out his hand for me to shake again, but I just looked down at it and back up into his eyes. I thought I saw hope in them, but he quickly got the hint that I wasn’t going to offer my hand anytime soon.
“I guess I’ll see you later tonight,” he said as he walked back into the locker room.

As soon as the doors shut, the three of them went crazy.
“Well that’s a way to meet someone!”
“I think you shot him down with your stare!”
“Did you see the way he was looking at you?! Man, he’s got it bad already and he doesn’t even know your last name.”
“Would you all shut up?!” I yelled. “Yes, I know that wasn’t one of my finest moments and I could have been nicer to him, but if you all weren’t trying to hook us up, maybe it wouldn’t have been that awkward!”
“Please,” Abby said, “he’s crazy about you! I bet you he’s sitting at his locker right now trying to figure out what the hell he did wrong to make you react that way! And I bet he’s also trying to figure out how to ask you out without being punched in the face!”
Colby replied, “Yeah, you may not like him, but he’s already writing your first name to his last name!”
“Colby..” I growled.
“Whoa,” Colby put his hands up, “don’t wanna set off the birthday girl.”
Ryan put his arm around my shoulders, “Just be nice to him, Rach. The least you could do is be a good friend. He doesn’t have many yet since he’s new here and he doesn’t need someone pushing him down.”
I sighed. I was pretty rude to him, and I did feel bad that he knew absolutely no one coming into this city. “All right, I will. Just don’t push us together, that’s all I’m asking.”
“Oh yeah, sure..” the three of them replied.

Somehow I didn’t believe them. The three of them started walking towards the exit so I followed them. I thought about the entire situation that had just occurred. To be honest, Sidney didn’t seem like a bad guy so far. He actually seemed pretty shy considering all the media that follows him around. I silently cursed myself for acting so foolish. He probably thought I was such a bitch now. I then decided to apologize to him at dinner ..that is, if he still decided to take up the offer.

Prologue

Hello everyone. This is my first story so any comments and suggestions are appreciated! Hope you enjoy the first chapter!

The inspiration: Stupid in Love - Rihanna.

July 30, 2005

“The first team to select in the 2005 NHL draft are the Pittsburgh Penguins.”

We all sat on the couch and stared at the television as we watched the general manager and Mario Lemieux walk up to the stage to announce who they have selected first.

As if we didn’t already know.

“LET’S GO PENS!” Ryan Malone shouted as he pumped his fist into the air.
“Would you calm down?” Abby asked. “I think they heard you in Montreal!”

“Baby, you have no idea how big of a deal this kid is to our team. He’s gonna put us back on the market and bring home a Cup for us!"
“The only Cup you’re bringing home anytime soon is the one you wear while you’re playing hockey so that it can look somewhat decent!” I joked with my friend. “Besides, I still don’t see the big deal about this guy.”
“You just wait and see..” Ryan responded as he threw a popcorn kernel at me from the bowl in his lap.

“..The Pittsburgh Penguins select from Rimouski Quebec Junior Major League: Sidney Crosby,” Craig Patrick announced as we watched Sidney hug an older man who I assumed was his father. He then proceeded to the stage and shook everyone’s hand.

All I had heard about this kid was basically that he was a hockey saint in Canada. Anything that involved a puck could not be said without his name being mentioned, and to be honest, it annoyed the crap out of me. So this guy can play hockey, so what? My sister can touch her nose with her tongue, and I don’t see her being recognized for her odd talent. Yet, Ryan and the rest of the guys from the team couldn’t stop talking about how this was going to be a huge change for them ..a good one that is.

I guess I should introduce myself. My name is Rachel Kenzington. I’m 15, and I just finished my sophomore year in high school. I’ve lived in Pittsburgh my whole life and was basically brought up to be a Penguins fan. I love hockey - it’s the only sport that I can really get into and have a full understanding at the same time. I loved the rush of the game; you can’t blink for one second without missing a beat. It also helps that one of my best friends plays for the team.

“Who wants to bet we win a Cup in the next 5 years?"

“You better stop yourself before you’re disappointed; he’s not even 18, Ryan,” Abby said.

Ryan and I met through my cousin, Jeff. They both played hockey together when they were in high school for their team. My family and I would always go to Jeff’s games to support him, so it wasn’t long before I was introduced to the character. Needless to say, Ryan and I clicked immediately. His sense of humor was kind of sick, but hilarious at the same time. It wasn’t long after that I was introduced to Abby, his girlfriend. Whenever my family couldn’t make it to a game, Abby would always invite me to tag along with her, and we quickly became friends. Jeff and I would often go out with them to dinner or even to the rink at the Iceoplex to attempt to teach me how to ice skate.

“Rachel, you can’t keep your feet apart like that or you’re going to fall,” Jeff would say as he would try his best to not laugh at me as I was holding onto the wall for life.
“I can’t help it! My feet have a mind of their own!”
“But you’re doing fine! Now, try to let go of the wall and skate towards me.”

I would try my best, and Jeff was only two feet away. However, I would soon find myself on the ice trying to get up quickly because my butt was frozen.

Jeff laughed as he held out his hands for me to stand up, “Rachel, you dance as if gravity can’t hold you down, but you can’t ice skate? How does that make sense?”
“Jeff, think of who you’re talking about here. What about Rachel DOES make sense?” Ryan joked as he and Abby skated over to us.
“You know, I’m not quite sure myself since I continue to hang out with YOU,” I said as I stood up and skated myself along the wall towards the exit of the ice rink.

Okay, so I can’t ice skate. I’ve admitted this many times and have refused to try in front of anyone else, including my group of friends. It’s just too embarrassing for me, and it’s not like I really need to learn how to. I have plenty of other hobbies of my own to keep me busy. I have danced ever since I was in preschool at a local dance studio. I made our competitive dance team in middle school and have been winning awards ever since for our group’s performances on tap, jazz, and lyrical. Dancing is one of my ways to just let my feelings out into music. The way it keeps me in shape isn’t a bad thing either.

But my main passion is singing. I always sing although it’s usually not in front of anyone except my reflection in the mirror. My parents didn’t even know I could sing until my church’s Christmas play in kindergarten when the music director gave me a solo. People were shocked at how such a strong voice came out of such a little girl. However, the attention from everyone scared me. I hated the feeling that everyone was watching me. Needless to say, I never really accepted another solo again. The music director even tried to get me involved with a singing group at Duquesne University which apparently was a HUGE deal for my age. However, my mother declined for me, claiming that she wanted me to choose how I wanted to live my life and that this type of singing would take up most of it.

So that’s what I’ve been doing. Living my life from day-to-day never knowing what part of my script is going to be written next. When Ryan and Jeff graduated from high school, they both went off to college. We would still get together as a group, but then Jeff started dating his girlfriend, Emma, who would eventually become his wife. The whole group kind of separated, but Ryan, Abby, and I would always hang out together. It gets kind of weird since I’m still in high school, but the way we act doesn’t make an age difference at all. The most exciting moment we’ve had was when Ryan was drafted to the Pittsburgh Penguins. You could not wipe the grin off the boy’s face for weeks. It was awesome to see my friend’s dreams becoming a reality, and I couldn’t help but be jealous. Ever since I was little, I’ve always dreamed of me performing on a stage for thousands of people screaming my name. The shy part of me would always get in the way, and I’m trying to accept that that dream will only be a dream.

Ryan began his first season in the NHL. I was surprised that he still wanted to keep our friendship alive. After his first home game, he brought me down to the locker room with Abby and introduced me to all of the guys. For some reason, I just felt so comfortable with them. They were like older brothers and fathers to me. I could easily joke with them and not feel judged at all. I was worried that they were going to think of me as a puck bunny, but there was no worrying about that. I was not interested in dating a hockey player. I don’t know how Abby deals with Ryan’s schedule of him being gone all the time. I think that would kill me. But she always says that love takes the wheel and you’re just along for the ride.

I’ve had my fair share of guys. I’ve only been in one real relationship. His name is Jake, and we’re in the same grade. We started dating in seventh grade, and as stupid as it sounds, I fell in love with him. He had this charm that would always win me over, and he knew how to treat a girl ..or so I thought. The beginning of my freshmen year, he dumped me because he “let this thing go too long and didn’t want to lead me on anymore.” In other words, I wouldn’t sleep with him, and the popular girl in school was going to give it to him. I was hurt and crushed for the first time in my life by a guy. So ever since then, I’ve kept my distance from guys. I’ve had many of them ask me out on a date or to our winter dance, but my guard always kept me from saying yes. I didn’t trust guys. They only had a girl on their mind until they accomplished their task and moved on to the next victim.

“Whoa, someone‘s got some junk in the trunk!” Abby pointed towards the TV as Sidney turned to put on his jersey.
“Wait a sec, mine’s not good enough?!” Ryan pouted.

“Honey, you know I think you have a good butt, but I’m pretty sure Sidney switched his with Jennifer Lopez’s.”

I had to laugh at this. But at the same time as I watched him pose for pictures on the stage, I couldn’t help but be nervous about him coming to Pittsburgh. I don’t know what it is, but there’s something about him that I don’t like. Granted, I already think he’s most likely cocky for the hype that everyone has him living up to. If he thought he was gonna own this team, he was wrong. And I was going to make sure he didn’t ruin things for anyone on the team.

“Well, now that that’s over, we can watch Titanic,” Abby said as she got up to put the DVD in.

“You girls want to know what happens? The boat sinks, the end.”

“That’s not all, Ryan!” I yelled at him.

“Oh, come on! Leo DiCaprio has aged since this movie first came out, y’know! And who the hell loses a pair of binoculars on a ship!? Granted, they could have prevented the damn thing from colliding with the iceberg if they weren’t too busy watching the lovers make out below them! I would have had those two morons walk the plank before any of that happened!”
“Ryan, don’t you need to go practice or something?” Abby asked annoyed.
“Shit! I was supposed to meet Marc and Max at the rink an hour and a half ago!” he replied as he hurriedly ran around his house to gather his hockey equipment and called Marc-Andre Fleury.
“Dude, are you guys still there? .. Yes, I am aware of what time it is, I just got distracted by watching the draft…Yes, I’m coming…Yes…Would you stop speaking French?!” Ryan said as he quickly kissed Abby and messed up my hair as he walked out the door.

Abby and I looked at each other and just started laughing. As she pressed play on the DVD remote, she said, “Sometimes, I don’t know how I deal with that boy, but I love him enough to do so.”
“It’s never boring, that’s for sure,” I replied.
Abby rolled her eyes, “This is true. So have any guys come across your radar lately?”
I shook my head, “Nope, not interested in a relationship right now. Just trying to focus on myself.”
Abby looked at me like I had two heads, “I know you better than that. You have to get over the whole Jake thing. It’s been two years. Yeah, he ended up being an asshole, but there’s plenty of good guys out there, Rach.”
“Yeah, I can’t wait until one guy proves me wrong,” I said as I ate more popcorn from the bowl.
“Listen, you never know who you’re going to meet and when you’re going to meet them. You have to be open to people to get to know them at least. Who knows, you might already know the man you’re going to marry and you don’t even know it yet.”
“That’s kinda creepy..who in the world would I end up marrying?”
“Who knows? Maybe someone at your school, your church..one of the guys on the team..”
“Yeah, right. Like that would ever happen.”
“Well, Max keeps trying to ask you out,” Abby smirked at me.
“Max asks out anything that has boobs and long legs and is a walking Playboy. I don’t think so.”
“This is true. Plus his age is a little off .. Say, what about Sidney? He’s close to your age; you guys are only two years apart.”
I gave her a crazy look, “Please, if he is who people say he is, I don’t plan on adding to his ego. I’m sure he already has girls swooning over him if he doesn’t already have a girlfriend.”
“I don’t know why you’re so against him. You haven’t even met him yet. He seems like a nice guy.”
“Yeah, well as long as he doesn’t come off as the King of the world..”
“Watch you two fall in love,” Abby joked as I pretended to gag. “Okay, okay, I get the point. You just never know..”

I ended the conversation by focusing on Jack Dawson as he saved Rose’s life by pulling her over from the other side of the ship. I wanted a love like that. Someone changing someone else’s mind about love and life for the better. I doubt there was a guy like that in the world for me, especially Sidney. I wasn’t about to take any chances with this kid and become another name to his list of girls.

I may be dumb, but I’m not stupid.